Hypomania

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When I feel like this it’s like I’ve shot up with electricity. The colours are brighter and more beautiful, people are more interesting and my mind is working like a well oiled, magical machine. Perhaps a little too well.

Sleep becomes difficult in times of hypomania. Not impossible, but the truth is… I don’t want to sleep. I want to write. I want to draw. I want to dance. Things flow so effortlessly and it’s hard not to take advantage of my increased motivation and levels of productivity (especially after being in the depths of depression where nothing gets done).

I have never experienced mania, as I have Bipolar Disorder II (at least that’s what I’ve been told). I can only imagine how terrifyingly intense it must feel. Of course there is the difference between euphoric and dysphoric mania… an important distinction. One that applies to hypomania as well.

The sheer restlessness that comes with these highs can become rather destructive, not to mention physically unhealthy. In the end it comes down to self awareness, discipline and self care; things I am still cultivating. It’s all about channelling the high into constructive things, and not feeding the beast. God help me.

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